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TOOTSIE'S CABARET
WELL BEHAVED WOMEN BARELY MAKE HISTORY
- Marilyn Monore
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| There was a time not too long ago when
Tootsie's was a little spot on the corner of 441
and Miami Gardens Drive that you could stop
by on the way home from a Dolphins game.
Oh, but times have changed. From the time
you drive up to the vastly expanded and newly
remodeled Tootsie's, you know this is going
to be a different kind of Strip Club experience.
While they do offer valet parking, the self parking lot is so expansive the club actually offers
a tram to get you to the front door. Kind of like
at Disneyland where you park in "Goofy" and
they pick you up at a designated stop. Except
instead of friendly oversized animal puppets
when you get inside, they have friendly, oversized D-Cups to greet you. And you can't take
pictures. |
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| Upon walking inside you will notice the vast
array of flat screen and projection TV's, so
that if naked women cavorting around is not
your thing you can distract yourself with fully
clothed men playing sports. There is one main
stage in the middle which features anywhere
from one to three dancers, one of them
circulating the tip rail for a song or two,
completely naked, allowing everyone at the
rail to tuck a buck in their favorite spot. In
addition there are several themed areas of
the expansive club, including an MGM Grand
area, a Moulin Rouge area, and something
that looks like a hollowed out rail car that
doubles as a VIP level (it is elevated about
3 feet form the rest of the club to give it an
air of "exclusivity").
Each of these themed sections offers a VIP
area, and the Moulin Rouge is home to what
looks from the outside to be a Parisian
boutique hotel. |
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Of course, in Miami, anything that combines
France and a bed can only be one thing: A
champagne room.
These rooms start at $275 for a half an hour
which includes a bottle of house Champagne
(my guess is that it, much like the Moulin
Rouge façade, is not actually French) and
the company of one of the hundreds of
ladies working that night. But, of course,
the girl's time is also extra. The rooms are
upstairs and offer full-length windows out
onto the club with closable shades. Kinda
like a real hotel. |
Should you go on a weekend, there will
be well over 100 girls working, and they
are a solid mix of American, Latina, Black
and even a few Asians sprinkled in. And
for the most part they are top notch, on
par with what you'd find at any club in Las
Vegas. If you have a certain girl you want
to see straddling the pole, there is a monitor
in one corner of the club that features every
girl and her spot in the dance rotation so
you can see who is up next and who just got
off stage.
So if one caught your eye as she tossed
her G-String in your face, you can ask a
waitress to find her. The waitresses can
also bring you anything from their full-
liquor bar. There are separate waitresses
for the food from LaColonne, the restaurant
located inside the club. The food is better
than most bar food you'll get in places that
do not feature fully naked women, and if
you go before 8 there is no cover.
Tootsie's is essentially a Strip Super-
Club along the lines of giant ones found
in Vegas or New York. The selection on
women is spectacular and the food is
not bad. They also feature "In the Biz"
specials for those who are waiters,
bartenders, strippers and the like,
consisting of a waived cover and $3
drinks Sunday through Thursday. Now
if only they could get you a break on
those bottles of "champagne."
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